Me Being Silly:
I came to my favorite Saturday morning spot: a Barnes and Noble/Starbucks that's near my apartment. I LOVE this place. I swear the only thing keeping me from passing out on this wooden bench is my grande coffee and fear of embarrassment.
As I sit here I am trying to remember what the heck happened this past month because it seems like such a blur ! Time continues to pass us by, my friends. As one of my favorite quotes says: "If you are worried about whether or not you should do something because it may take too much time: Know that time will pass by anyway". (or something among those lines!). Note to self: Google quote and find out who said it.
OK so for this post, I figured I'd focus on the five top "significant" events of this past month. Although I may not have updated the blog as often as I should have; I went through a few events which I feel where significant "transition" periods in my personal growth.
I seriously feel more confident, stronger, fearless; and all of these have been more INTERNAL changes which have started manifesting themselves externally. Some of the points I will note below probably deserve their whole entire post so I may briefly summarize some of them and elaborate more on future entries. Please bare with me!
1. Finished my 30 day Meatless-challenge successfully: This is one that deserves its own post. However, I'd like to quickly point out that this was a pure success! I fiished strong with my 30-day challenge around 08/04 (zero meat for 30 days). During the past few weeks I've started re-introducing chicken but mostly chicken that I prep at home or eat at my mom's house. My desire to order chicken at restaurants and anywhere else outsize my home has completely subsided, borderline disappeared and it feels so good! When I prep my own chicken/meat and it comes from a place I trust I feel better about eating it. I look for hormone-free, grass fed meat for the most part and I think this may be something I'll carry out for the long term. *I did make the mistake of ordering a chicken wrap at a quiznos about a week ago and it was so horrible that it just strengthened my mission to let go of "fast food chicken/meat" for lack of a better phrase.
2. Ran a whole lot (every other day 2.5-5.5 miles average) and continued my strength training (my arms are toned!): No explanation needed! Only that I feel stronger, my stamina continues to strengthen, and my fitness level continues to improve. So incredibly thankful for my legs, my lungs, my heart, my entire body and all the work they do for me. My body-image and self-esteem has reached new, incredible heights. I'm learning to see my body with different eyes. I may not be Adriana Lima but I have a body that can do amazing things and that's simply, priceless. "If you have health, you have everything".
3. Decided to adopt a "Guilt-Less" eating mentality: Although I strive to eat balanced, wholesome healthy foods that are good for my body around 80-90% of the time; up until recently I still struggled with feelings of "guilt" when I reached for a candy bar (usually out of boredom), ate too many chips in front of the television after dinner, or had 1 too many servings of my mom's food or bowls of cereal, just to name some examples. Well, I've realized that a lot of this "extra" eating arise from certain triggers (sadness, boredom, occasional loneliness, anxiety, etc.). I know what my triggers are (thanks to years of food-journaling) and I know that there is nothing wrong with me. People deal with things in different ways and I know this is something I can consciously work on. However, I have decided to STOP feeling guilty about these things. Its not easy at first but when I find myself thinking "oh man! I shouldn't have eaten all that candy" or "why did I just eat all that food?" I STOP myself and let the harming thought "pass me by". I have been watching some meditation videos which have thought me that, when it comes to those kind of thoughts; is okay to "acknowledge" their presence and then LET THEM GO. And that's what I've been doing and is working wonders. Still a work in progress but I shall discuss this more in the future.
4. Took the initiative to end something that was not adding significant to my life: Wow! This was kinda' hard. But in a nutshell, I had been dating someone on and off for about 9 months. He was (is) a wonderful guy and I was having a lot of fun. However, I knew from the beginning that something was "off". He wasn't contributing anything significant to my life, other than occasional dates, which where in fact fun. But his actions were often misleading and one day I woke up and realized that I needed to move on and let go of that. So, I had the "talk" and pretty much layed out that, although I feel he is a wonderful person, we are better off as friends. I cant begin to tell you what a RELIEVE I felt after that. Although I did have some feelings for this person i realized that's not the person I meant to be with and so, I let that go and it was a huge weight off my shoulders! There is more of a "back ground" story to this but I just want to share how amazing it feels to let go of something that is not meant for you.
5. Told someone how I felt about them, expecting nothing in return <--- this was hard and so incredibly liberating at the same damn time). This deserves its own post. HUGE milestone for me and something I've never really done before. This story is still "developing". But my heart is happy just because I finally allowed it to speak!
6. Learned to care less about people's opinion (AND IM SO MUCH HAPPIER). Need I say more??? This is still a work in progress but such a HUGE step on the right direction for me. As another one of my favorite quotes says: "when you stop caring what people think, you've already taken the first step towards success". Not sure who said this either but love it.
7. Finally learned (learning?) to rely more on my instincts and quiet the noise around me (goes hand in hand with trusting myself more about certain things rather than asking a million people about their opinions and ending up even more frustrated).
8. The LOVE for my parents grew even more: this is random but they went on vacation and I missed them terribly. I was so happy when they came back. I just figured this deserved to be on the list.
9. Spent some quality time with
*We played "cards against humanity" and some other silly games. Had a blast, met some new people, enjoyed a gorgeous summer day in NYC. Life is good.
Ok peoples, there you have it. Cheers to Agust 2013. Its been real! Cant believe we are soon entering the "-ber months", as I like to call them (September, October November ..) and my absolute 'fave month of every year: December!
However, lets not get carried away. My mission for the upcoming months/days: to live in the present moment as much as possible, to strengthen my internal-trust, and to be patient & enjoy the journey <3